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Can You Save Your Relationship?

Written by DearVagina, 450 days ago, 0 Comments

Do you want to save your relationship before it is too late?  Perhaps a part of you still loves him or maybe you have kids together and want to try to make it work. But, everything seems to be going wrong. You guys can’t seem to get along. You are constantly fighting and have lost respect for each other. So what do you do to save your relationship? If there was a perfect answer, it would be a perfect world. The truth is there is no one right answer to save your relationship. Every couple is different and has different needs and wants. That being said, there are a few things you can try in order to try and save your relationship, but remember nothing is guaranteed and the other person also has to want to make it work.

save your relationship

Tips to Save your Relationship:

1. Try to never go to bed upset. After your next yelling match, instead of simply going to bed and ignoring each other take a walk alone. Gather your thoughts and try and calm down. Try and see it from your partner’s perspective. Instead of only focusing on what you believe to be right, think of a few things that you would be willing to do to make it work. I’m not saying you should ignore your feeling, but simply try to consider what your spouse feels. Once you think you are ready to come back, the first thing you should do is give each other a hug before you start your discussion. This may sound ridiculous, but it truly does work. Give each other a tight firm long hug. This will allow you guys to comfort each other and show your love. It will allow you to start your discussion on a calmer note.

Hold Your Tongue To Save Your Relationship

2. Don’t use profanity during an argument. This is important when you want to save your relationship. Why? Because when you get into the habit of using profanity in an argument, then you begin to lose respect for each other. Speak to your partner how you would like to be spoken to. If you don’t want to be called a bitch than don’t call him an asshole. It is often difficult to save your relationship, when you simply can’t forgive your partner for something he or she said. So try to keep it respectful. Before you say something you might regret, try and to calm down and think about how it would make you feel to be called horrible things, especially when they are potentially destructive to your relationship.

Save your Relationship with Counseling

3. Many couples don’t want to go to counseling for a variety of reasons. However if you really want to save your relationship and are committed to doing so, than counseling is something you should really consider. Counseling can give you a different perspective on how to treat each other and work on your problems. It can open you up to possibilities you didn’t think of. Find the right therapist that both of you feel comfortable with. Search around and take your time in order to find the right person.

Save your Relationship by Spending More Time Together

4. Make a commitment to spend more time together. This is especially true if you have children. After having children, many couples forget about date night and focus only on their children. Although you definitely want to make your children your priority, mommy and daddy also have to be a priority if you want to have a happy home. Pick one night a week to get a babysitter and go out on the town. Don’t just throw on an old shirt and pants, instead spend some time and effort into looking good for your date. Act as though it is the first time you guys are going out, so get ready for your first date. Put on that sexy dress that hugs your body, with those sexy heels he loves to see you in.

Dinner Dates to Save your Relationship

5. Spicing up the romance is a great step towards trying to save your relationship. After a while, couples tend to lose their romantic side because they get caught up with work, kids, and life. When you were first dating, romance was a priority because you were trying to impress each other.  Now you know everything about each other and there are no new surprises, but you can still bring that passion back.  Plan surprise romantic dinners more often. You don’t have to go out to dinner and spend a lot of money. Instead you can make special dinners at home. If you have kids, spend the extra bucks on a babysitter.  Don’t rush through your dinner, take your time and enjoy conversation. Do not discuss anything that needs to be done with your home, kids, and errands. This is your time to simply laugh and enjoy each other. Tell him how much you appreciate him and why. Keep it romantic.

Sex and Saving your Relationship

6. Spice up your sex life. Remember when you first started dating? You could barely keep your hands off each other. But then life happened. Things began to change and sex began to happen less and less. For many couples, sex begins to dwindle after they have children. This doesn’t have to happen and it is important that it doesn’t in order to save your relationship. Although sex is not what a relationship should be based on,  it is still a crucial part of a relationship. It allows us to feel close and loving. It is also a great way to release stress from the pressures of our daily lives.

Don’t Rush to Take a Break  to Save your Relationship

7. Some people recommend taking time apart in order to save your relationship, but I completely disagree. Why? Space doesn’t resolve the issue/s you are having. Once you return to each other the problem/s still exist. Are you going to run every time a problem happens? Instead,  take action if you want to save your relationship. Try to find a middle ground that makes both feel more comfortable. Don’t be selfish. Try to see it from your partner’s point of view. Be patient and don’t expect a quick fix.

If you really do need space, then take a day or two away from each other. I do not recommend anything longer. The only time it is a good idea to take a long break is when one person is confused about wanting to be in the relationship.

8. If money is an issue in your relationship then make a commitment to have monthly financial meetings. When couples fight about money, it is often the case that one person feels out of the loop in regards to how the other person is spending money. During your meetings, discuss what goals you have and come up with a plan to work towards it.

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